I Know the Ending of this Story

I never thought I would be that girl? The girl who would be willing to break up a relationship. The girl who would kiss another girls' boyfriend and not even think twice.

But I am that girl. No, I'm worse than that girl.

For five days, I saw the girlfriend's car sitting in his driveway. I hated that car. It was bright red and obnoxious, just like I thought she would be.

On Friday, my friend an I made brownies, and decided to take some over to Jim and Will. Jim answered the door, and once again I was taken back by how perfect he is. His smell, the way he looked at me, everything was perfect. I heard the girlfriend in the background, and saw her moving around on the couch. But at that point she was still just a face, not a real person. Jim invited Megan and I over later for a fire. I was surprised, but excited. But that night, the fire didn't happen.

The next day, Megan and I were taking a painting class, when Jim invited us to another fire. I was nervous, I didn't want to meet his girlfriend. I didn't want to see them together. But, I wanted to be around him, so we went.

It was interesting.

I think the girlfriend knew something was up from the beginning. She was nice. I would probably be her friend if I wasn't trying to steal her boyfriend. But from the conversations we all had sitting around the fire, it was pretty obvious the Jim and I have spent a lot of time together.

A couple of weeks earlier, Jim talked to my mom on the phone, so when my mom called at this fire, he asked to talk to her again. We had inside jokes and texted each other while at the fire. Then, I mentioned that I thought I had glass in my foot, which is a whole other story, and Jim came over to check it out. He held on a little too long. I wasn't really paying attention to the rest of the people at the fire but Megan said the conversation went something like this:

Will: "Man I don't know how you are doing that, I hate feet!!"
Danielle: (In an annoyed tone) "Yeah, Jim hates feet too."

She went to bed shortly after that, without saying goodbye.

After everyone left (including Megan), Jim and I had time to talk. I told him that Danielle was nice, and that I didn't want her to be nice. I wanted to hate her, but I couldn't. He said she was in a bad mood, and that she was leaving in the morning. We put out the fire and he walked me home.

We talked for a few minutes, and I couldn't hold back. I grabbed him and kissed him and it was just like before.

I became that girl.

And at least for now, I don't regret it.

He told me I make things difficult. He said that he needs to think and that he has a decision to make.

I told him that I was jealous of his girlfriend, because she was with him and she got to spend time with him. He said that I'm the one he thinks about. He said he can't control himself around me and that he enjoys spending time with me.

We kissed some more and then he went back home.

I was getting ready for be and I got a text...

"Stacy, I can't explain it, I just enjoy being with you. We've been neighbors for 9 months, why did I just meet you now."

Because life sucks, that's why.

There is one person in this whole place that was worth meeting. He has lived next door since October, and now I meet him? Right when he is getting ready to leave? After he started dating his girlfriend.

If things would have been different, if the timing would have been right, who knows what might have happened? But he is leaving at the end of the month to go back to Boston, and I'm going to Ohio soon. And things just won't work.

And it just isn't fair.

I know the ending of our story. He will stay with his girlfriend, go back to Boston, and forget about me. I will spend the next few months wondering what might have been, until I find someone new. We will promise to keep in touch, even though we both know it wont happen.

And that will be it... and I couldn't be more bitter.