This is from Mohican a couple of falls ago. :-)

This is one of my favorite times of year. I love the smell of pumpkin spice. I love the way the hillside around my house is set on fire with the changing leaves. I love corn mazes, and hayrides, and hoodies.

This fall is kind of unique, because it is my last fall as an undergraduate at Malone. So, in many ways, this season is bittersweet. I'm trying to make the most of this semester and this school year, but it is hard when I am constantly reminded that the real world is just a few months away.

Quite honestly, I'm scared.

I know I've mentioned this before, but I feel as if I'm constantly fighting one particular spiritual battle. When I'm faced with tough decisions, or even little ones, I pray for guidance. I ask God to lead the way, to help me make the decisions that he would want me to make. And then I wait. I wait for an answer or a sign. I wait for some divine inspiration that will show me exactly what I need to do.

But that sign never comes.

James 1:5 tells us that if we ask God for wisdom, God will give it to him. Well, I keep asking... but I'm still waiting.

On Thursday, I met with both of my advisers for the last time. Both of them asked about my next steps. What will I do after I graduate? The truth is, I don't really know. Sure I have a lot of ideas. I know what I want for my life. But how do I know if what I wan't is really in God's plan?

I know that I am supposed to love God, and love others. But there are so many ways to do that. What will make God happy? What will make me happy?

Looking back on my journey, I get a new perspective of the ways that God has influenced my path. I have made a lot of plans for my life. Some of them have worked out, and others haven't, but when I look at the things that ultimately lead to my successes and failures, I can see how God is working in my life.

It's hard to have faith that my life is going to turn out alright, but when I think about all of the reasons I have to be faithful, it becomes a lot easier. If you would have asked me a few years ago where I would be now, I would have said that I would be close to graduating from the branch of Kent State near my house, with a degree in early childhood education.

I'm so thankful that that plan didn't work out.

I guess I'm just saying that...

I don't really know what I'm saying.

God is good... I wish I had more guidance... But even when I don't know what His plan is, he still has a plan that is much better than mine.

Yeah... that's it.

Happy Halloween!